i feel quite sian lately. i see no point in doing tutorials. i see no point in studying. i duno wats wrong with me.

been spacing out quite often. haix.

shant talk abt that now. anyway, CNY just came and went like this. bx and i were couting down to CNY and suddenly its over alr>.< ate like a pig during this period. haha. and went to sherman's house on tuesday.. first time i go fren's house during CNY=p haha. met at orchard before gg his house, cuz they wanted to have lunch.. then we celebrated audrey's birthday by buying her a cake(: then went to sherman's house.. xue lin played the piano for us! haha. damn nice. sherman also. and his mum prepared chocolate fondue for us somemore. so nice right.

ytd went to watch protege with S17. just realised its nc16. no wonder got all those scenes. anyway, before this show i already dun really like smoking and drug abuse. now see this show le, im TERRIFIED of it. if given a choice, i wun want to watch this show. gory. terrifying. argh.

they always sae im easily stressed out. now even this kind of small thing i also stress out. which explains the sian-ness. the "want-to-but-dont-want-to" feeling. is this really stress? when some things go this way, perhaps its really for the best? its my life but most of the times, i just don't get to make the decisions.

我不会怪你对我的伪装
天使在人间是该藏好翅膀
人们愚蠢鲁莽而你纤细善良
怎能让你为了我被碰伤
小小的手掌厚厚的温暖
你总能平复我不安的夜晚
不敢想的梦想透过你的眼光
我才看见它原来在前方
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望
小小的手掌大大的力量
我一定也会像你一样飞翔
你想去的地方就是我的方向
有我保护笑容尽管灿烂
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望
要不是你出现
我一定还在沉睡
绝望的以为生命只有黑夜
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望

i like this song.. its the song for hana kimi.. some parts are really sweet(:

专属天使
近在咫弛
没人能了解我的心情
我没那个胆量
去接近你
只能默默地看着你离去

haha. now can see my posts le(: yay. these few days had been busy with visiting. anyway, happy chinese new year to all!! its the year of the pig!! we can all officially sleep and eat and roll in the mud=D

ate tonnes and tonnes of pineapple tarts, bak gua, kueh bankit, kueh bulu.. and lots of other stuff. i think i just gained back ALL the weight i lost over the hols. haix. and mb gained some extra weight too>.<

today went for ogl outing. go sherman's house.. before tt we met at orchard. actually our aim was to eat the half-priced waffles at Gelare.. but in the end nv eat.. for lunch we went to the cha chan ting. the chicken chop cheese baked rice quite nice(: then jiayi and i tried to do a disappearing act to go buy audrey's bdae cake. but got found out>.< haha. but in the end we sae go toilet, then went to Han's to buy choc truffle cake. damn nice(:

went sherman's house aft tt.. his house mansionette leh. is tt how u spell? and he so rich la. go all the countries collect poker cards. and the goodies also from italy one. every year go overseas at least once. so good>.< and his mum specially prepared choc fondue for us! damn nice leh(:

even though we went out since 11am.. it felt so short.. with them, time always passes super fast. i miss the days where we stayed back to practise the walk in. even though we had to stay back late, it was always enjoyable. if only i can turn back time.. hard to imagine how life will be like without them>.<

im forever spacing out these days.. somehow i think its her. the way they are always together, the way she asked about that present.. its just my intuition. and their dispaly is just so similar. perhaps that explains the reply. but that doesn prevent me from spacing out. wat if its true? there's nothign i can do anyway. argh. wake up!!! there's tonnes of things to do!! no time to space out!! >.<

ahhh. cant seem to see my posts. wat went wrong?! test test.

happy valentines' day everyone! haha. even though the greeting came kinda late.. its the thought that counts right(:

been super busy.. went for talentime with s17 on 2 feb.. b4 that went for dinner with shermin, ivana and vivien.. quite alot of people from s17 turned up, and it was like a mini class gathering.. and it was quite an enjoyable evening(:

really glad that i got to know s17 through orientation.. feeling rather nonstalgic.. can still rmb so clearly how me, bx, fy and aud were considering if we should even be an ogl or enjoy orientation.. if i hadn applied, cant imagine how life will be like. most prob i'll still be stuck in the situation that i was like last yr. last yr was quite a horrible year for me.. finding out things i wld rather have not known, but also got to know the meaning of true friends. i guess there'a always gains and losses in life..

thats how i thought life would be.. until i met the ogls. still rmb how screwed up our first meeting was. i really regretted submittin the form aft that first meeting, and i din even feel like gg for future gatherings. but luckily i did(: dec 2006 was a really memorable time for me, cuz i got to know the best people ever.. it was only till then that i realised what was called "life took a turn for the better"..

being around the ogls made me feel at ease, that i really belong. i really cant imagine life without them around next year. we went through so much together.. people who din even see each other, and dun even recall meeing each other come together and put in so much effort to make the walk in a success. this kind of experience is really once in a lifetime.. thanks so much to all the ogls. esp that group of you(:

and besides them, being the ogl of s17 really brought alot of joy into my life. i have never ever felt so fulfilled in my whole life before. they really taught me the meaning of fun. at first i still thougth they were sian, bt in a short period of 3 days, they completely changed that impression. i think now im closer to them than my class.. and the things they once said to me are really heartwarming. still rmb vivien saying "outings wun be fun without u" aww. haha. my heart just melted.

which explains why i was willing to spend so much of my time preparing their vday present instead of studying and doing hw. haha.

and this valentines' day, is one day i'll never ever forget. i wun have any regrets(: